How To Relax When Your Brain Won’t Let You


While most women will tell you that you don’t engage your brain often enough, the truth is that you probably OVER think.

This inability to switch off is why you never feel relax or rested.

Trying to unwind while your brain is still going over and over your fears and worries is like swimming against the tide.

While you may not remember your better half’s birthday, what it was she asked you to do five minutes ago or what you did yesterday, you probably do over think everything else.

Usually that’s some kind of worry.  Like what to do to grow your business, how to pay the bills or what beer to have with dinner.

The problem with over thinking is it doesn’t actually achieve anything.

It’s all just mental masturbation and you can bet you never act on any of it.overthinking_by_laurasvg-d4jjv7k.jpg

You just end up pre-occupying yourself with shit that you have no intention of dealing with, this rendering you completely useless in other areas of your life.

The best advice on offer is usually to ‘relax’ or ‘not worry about it’.  You know as well as I do that that’s the equivalent of asking someone where they last saw the item they are looking for.  In other words – completely fucking useless advice to say the least.

So is there anything that can be done to help you clear your mind and get some much needed relaxation time?

Well, yes! If there wasn’t then I wouldn’t be writing this!

Here are some of the things that I like to do to clear my mind of pointless fears and worries to help me get back on track with life.

Having said that, there is no guarantee that what works for you in one instance will work in another.


Make a plan

Running through all the possible solutions or ways of dealing with a problem is a good idea, IF you can avoid continually repeating your thought process over and over.

All the time things are racing through your head, they are out of control and seem much worse than they are.

Work through all the possible scenarios, actions and outcomes, decide on what you want to do and write it down.

Then stop!

Don’t rerun the exercise, it’s pointless.  You will end up changing your mind countless times but will keep coming back to what you decided to do originally.

The reason you decided on the course of action you wrote down is because it gave you the strongest feeling and that’s normally an indication that it’s what you want to do.  The sub conscious mind is pretty smart like that.


Take a pen and paper to bed

Don’t you just hate it when you need to go to sleep and your brain just won’t shut up and let you?

Same thing happens when you wake p in the middle of the night.

I’ve lost track of the number of amazing ideas I’ve come up with in the small hours only for them to have packed their bags and left me by the time I wake up.

There are two reasons why pen and paper works best in this instance;

Firstly, the light from your phone will disrupt your sleep for the rest of the night, even if you drift off immediately after writing.

Secondly, the temptation to read or reply to e-mails, messages and notifications can keep you awake for half the night.

And lastly is the ‘drunk text effect’.  Where you wake up and read something back only to have no idea what it’s about.  It’s either a random sequence of symbols, numbers and emojis or your phone has taken the liberty to use predictive text to ‘help’ you out.


Deal with it

The reality of a situation is never as bad as you anticipate it being in your head.

The sooner you deal with it and take action, the less stress and worry you will put yourself under and the more useful and productive stuff you’ll get done.

The only exception I can think of would be going to the dentist.

That dude is very high on my ‘things to avoid doing forever’ list as nothing good can come of it.

There are probably a few things that you might want to put on that list too but you have to be brutally honest with yourself with those things.

If you’re not sure whether avoiding something is in your best interests or not get someone you trust to play devil’s advocate and you’ll soon know what the right thing to do is.


Relax and don’t worry about it

Once you’ve actually done something about whatever is bothering you or there’s nothing more that can be done, at least for the time being you can then try and relax by distracting yourself with something.

That can be work or it could simply be something that you enjoy doing.

Knowing that you have a plan in place or that you have done all you can for the time being leaves you with no other choice than to kick back and relax.

It will also leave you better equipped to deal with the next worry that decides to park itself bang in the middle of your brain.

I’ll leave you with a mental teaser…….

When is your significant other’s birthday???



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